From the Desk of…
70 degrees? If this is coming in like a lion, I don’t wanna know what the lamb looks like. I literally don’t remember any news stories because I feel like I haven’t slept since the last newsletter. The Dilbert dude got into trouble, but that’s stretching the definition of “news.” I just think it’s funny. Oh, yeah, Les Wexner is dodging subpoenas related to Epstein. Very normal behavior for the man who has his name all over town and who allegedly worked Kristina Johnson into such a shoot that she had to resign from OSU. Platform Beer shut down, good riddance. AND SPEAKING OF GOOD RIDDANCE, a solemn and sincere “got o hell” [sic] to now deceased state representative Kris Jordan. Some high-road liberals might bemoan the idea that I don’t mourn the passing of a man who spent his limited time on God’s green earth abusing his wife when not trying to ban abortions. I’m not going to be cowed into civility when someone so actively and consistently antithetical to my values shuffles off this mortal coil. Kris Jordan, we sadly knew thee. Anyway, let’s peek in on the brain.
The Brain Dump
i think, and this might be controversial to say, but of the classic monsters, mummies are perhaps the boringest
this is bs how can john kerry set the alaskan weather machine such that i can take out the trash in short shorts one day and be chilly under a blanket the next, this is just more blood on bush's hands smdh
[whispering to date while watching Cocaine Bear when Cocaine Bear first appears on the screen] That's Cocaine Bear
it is my godgiven right as a midwesterner to sit on the porch during a tornado warning
they should make hot uncrustables with like chicken and vegetables
Oh yeah, now that’s the good brain garbage. Also, I guess this button turns into a pledge option if you’re already subscribed? I never intend to figure out how Stripe works, so don’t bother. Just read the thoughts or don’t.
At the Movies
I really wish Cocaine Bear had been better… or worse.
Cocaine Bear (2023), dirs. Elizabeth Banks ⭐⭐⭐⭐
much better than I was expecting. actual laughing out loud at moments, and also a Mothersbaugh score
They Live (1988), dir. John Carpenter ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐❤️
It is a testament to his talent that John Carpenter could make a film this incredibly GOATed and have it be like... his third or fourth best movie. Like, this is what movies were made for. You can pull this apart across so many critical lenses, but it also still works on the surface level as the movie where the dude beats up aliens and blows stuff up. Piper at the top of his game cutting promos on our overlords, Keith David in disbelief, Buck Flower and Peter Jason in here. That score! Man, this movie rocks so hard.
The Adventures of Baron Munchausen (1988), dir. Terry Gilliam ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐❤️
God, what a triumph of filmmaking. Inordinately impactful on me and my modes of being. Just... John Neville is so good in this that it would piss me off if I weren't so delighted.
A good time for movies. RRR this week! Should be fun.
One Picture
By starting the first episode of Twin Peaks at 10:55:22 a.m., I was able to synchronize the moment. I regret nothing. Please stop reminding me that the third season came out like seven years ago.
In closing,
Be kind to one another. As certified Meow icon Tom Lehrer once said, “I know there are people in the world who do not love their fellow human beings, and I hate people like that!”