Senator's Selects 2025/04/09
It should be illegal to be this cold after the start of spring
From the Desk of…
Lousy Smarch weather. When I’m mayor, I’m going to invest in a public utility weather machine, and we’ll vote on how hot it should be. Anyway, are you feeling liberated yet?
After Trump announced a suite of tariffs that were more extreme than expected, with some economists claiming that they were fundamentally miscalculated, the markets have been absolutely roiled. Hedge fund managers are saying he’s on track to cause an “economic nuclear winter” unless he changes course. Instead, China’s tariffs will be increasing to 104% as of… well, he’s already done it by the time you’re reading this. Or, maybe he hasn’t. It changes by the hour, you know. Hell, you’ve got Walmart scrapping its forecasts because it’s not sure how cheaply it’ll be able to stock its shelves with Chinese chaff. [Editor’s Note: In the time since this draft was turned in, China has increased its tariffs on United States imports from 34% to 84%.] It’s a very sensible way to guide trade policies. Most analysts are upping the chances of recession to more likely than not, and if prices go up so much that demand severely drops… I guess that could cause a deflationary spiral as supplies sit unbought on shelves? Yay? Have to be careful though. Once people can’t afford to feed their families, they tend to get upset. After all, “in the eyes of the hungry there is a growing wrath. In the souls of the people the grapes of wrath are filling and growing heavy, growing heavy for the vintage.”
Of course, oh-so-clever Governor of California Gavin Newsom, the one whose podcast can’t stop platforming the alt-right, has simply asked foreign countries to exempt California products from the tariffs. Historically, it hasn’t really gone well when states try to get around federal tariffs. Of course, I don’t expect anyone in power to know that. Then again, the trades are saying China is thinking of banning Hollywood entirely. Moving on…
The war on public education continues to rage in Ohio, with the proposed budget allocating $500 million to private charters and voucher programs in contrast to the meager $220 million for the public school systems. Governor DeWine is, as always, laser-focused on the issues that matter, like banning cell phones from the classrooms. I get it! Can’t pry the kids away from their screens. I just think maybe there’s other stuff he should be concerned about it when it comes to their educations. He’s already signed Senate Bill 1, and I hear more changes could be on the way…
If all this is getting you a bit down, don’t worry! The folks in power have decided that empathy is a weakness, perhaps THE weakness that we must purge from our society. There’s a great article in The Guardian about how that rooted in unsubstantiated pseudoscientific thought descended from social Darwinism. Their determination to lack empathy is why I don’t feel bad laughing when I read articles like “Elon Musk Rage Quits Livestream After Being Cyberbullied by Gamers.” I mean, I would feel awful if I sit down to a gaming time and was getting harassed. I make an active effort not to be a wretched worthless waste though. It’s different when you see the screengrabs though. Oh, did I mention he was streaming?
Just trying to relax with some gaming time and techno tunes, but ELON_IS_A_PEEDOPHILE won’t stop spamming YOU HAVE NO REAL FRIENDS AND WILL DIE ALONE in the chat. It would be awful if it happened to someone else. That feeling awful though? That would be empathy, so really he should be glad to hear I’m laughing at him. So, what fell out of the brain this week?
The Brain Dump
rebalancing my stock portfolio into Wafting Windowsill Pies Ltd and Can of Beans Over a Fire Holdings
lunch is $10. if lunch is more than $10, go somewhere else. lunch is $10
ChatGPT just told me I am running a massive trade deficit with Taco Bell
full middle malcolmist
if I wanted to win the lottery, I would simply pick the right numbers. skill issue
Do You Want This?
Have you ever fantasized about relaxing by the fire with your special friend, enjoying a fresh pot of fondue while the beautiful nature sounds of the surrounding woods fill your cabin? Well then, you might be needing this!
Now, I know what you’re thinking. “But, Senator Meow, wouldn’t I be stealing the glory of whatever Nimrod felled this terrible beast?” And to that I say… YEAH, THAT’S THE WHOLE POINT, DILLWEED! The bear’s not gonna get any less dead from you objecting on ethical grounds either. This is a beat-to-hell second-hand carcass at best. Get real. I personally never knew that bear rugs got felt trims like this. I guess I just haven’t spent a lot of time looking into bears, rugs, things of that nature. Green wouldn’t have been my choice. The auction is at least honest about its condition, calling them “evident areas of wear and damage.” Don’t worry too much though! “A separate bag contains loose fur pieces.” A bottle of port wine and a hot glue gun later, this baby will be good as new and ready for some action. If you like bears, and I know some of you do, this is waiting for you at the Worthington warehouse… if you want it.
At the Movies
We’re cooking now. I’m loving every Dune 3 rumor that’s coming my way. Robert Pattinson should play a Guild Navigator. And how are they going to bring back Jason Momoa?
Star Trek: First Contact (1996), dir. Jonathan Frakes ⭐⭐⭐⭐ ❤️
It's undeniable fun, and I don't like a number of its character choices (which continue to define said characters in post-TNG media). And I really don't like the Borg Queen, which I understand the narrative reasons why you would do something like that, but I think it runs completely counter to everything I found interesting about the Borg... and the flick is undeniable fun. Great James Cromwell, as always.
Pray TV (1980), dir. Rick Friedberg ⭐⭐⭐
This is like UHF and Leap of Faith combined with neither of their strengths and all of their weaknesses and more. How did so many creatives I enjoy come together on this... nothing. Like Yellowbeard, just completely disappointing relative to the people in it. I know these people are funny! Why are they not funny here?
The Luckiest Man in America (2024), dir. Samir Oliveros ⭐⭐⭐⭐ ❤️
this is a great examination of what it's like to lock in when no one else is being fr rn
One Picture
Now, without further ado, your 2025 Primary Election Sample Meowlot.
In closing,
As usual, in lieu of the usual closing, I’ll use this space to expand on my choices above. Columbus City Council was tougher than I’d expect. I’ve met both with Jesse Vogel and with Kate Curry-Da-Souza (albeit in contexts much earlier than these current campaigns). I like Kate’s bonafides. I like Kate’s experience. I think, if the Franklin County Democratic Party were smarter, Kate is the exact sort of candidate I would be recruiting to run in the district. They aren’t that smart though, and I have no real expectation that they ever will be. I mean, that would take a concerted and sustained effort at organizing people to get involved with it at a very granular level. That’s a hard sell in and of itself. Anyway, I like Kate, but I’ve been very impressed with Jesse’s campaign organization and the people he’s managed to surround himself with. As such, Jesse Vogel is your Endorsed Senator Meow Candidate for City Council. If you’re so inclined, you can donate to him at this link. Because of our undemocratic democracy, everyone in the city will get to vote in this district election, so you may as well start by voting in its primary. What a city!
School board, longtime readers know that one has been tough lately. Why, it was only but a few months ago that Brandon Simmons was out there talking smack about the teachers’ union and taking notes on a conspiracy to undermine them. As such, there’s a lot of turnover as people rush off to do other things. The top six vote-getters from the primary will advance to the general, and the top three from there will be sat. There’s only ten running, so I’d like to see these three make it through to November: Mounir Lynch, Kimberley Mason, and Antoinette Miranda. Mounir Lynch is a Columbus City Schools grad, public health educator, board member of the Abortion Fund of Ohio, world-class chef, and all-around smart cookie. You can read more about him on his Ballotpedia page, where he has sagely filled out the Candidate Connection survey for 2025. Similarly, should you be so inclined, you can donate to him at this link here. Your money goes a long way in local races! Longer than throwing it into the raging inferno of national-level stuff. The other two names are likely familiar to long-time readers: Kim Mason ran in 2019 with my endorsement (not making it through the primary back then) and Antoinette Miranda in 2020 for State Board of Education with my endorsement (which she won!). I’m not going to reflect too long on how far away those years are. Anyway, while I hear Kim has had some hiccups with the screening boards as late, I’d still like to see her make it to November this time. Beyond November, well… we’ll just have to see, won’t we? Columbus City Schools is at a critical juncture point with the state budget slashing resources, and it’s going to need its savviest folks to thread the needle while respecting the teachers’ union. Those names again: Mounir Lynch, Kimberley Mason, and Antoinette Miranda.
Issue 2 has been re-approved several times over several decades in the state and is not controversial. If you like public infrastructure, you should probably vote Yes. I will be.
I thought about weighing in on some of the suburban races. I liked what I saw out of Micole L. Spicer for Whitehall City Council, and I was impressed with how slick a lot of the campaign websites were for Hilliard City Council (maybe I shouldn’t have been). There, I was looking mostly at Dorothy Hassan, Samer Bazerbashi, Kathy Parker-Jones, and incumbent Tina Cottone. I miss Cynthia though. Nothing I found elevated anything to the level of endorsement, however.
Until next time, go vote! Early voting runs until Election Day, Tuesday, May 6th. Find the Board of Election’s hours at their website.
OH, and if you live in Columbus 21-F and can vote Yes on the liquor sales for Wario’s Beef and Pork, SO DO. Okay, bye bye now!
Come for the Grapes of Wrath quote, stay for the First Contact insight. First Contact is probably my favorite bit of Star Trek media, honestly (or, well, tied with DS9's Far Beyond the Stars), but I'm sure some of that is nostalgia. I tear up every time Picard shows Lily the Earth from space, tho.